Benjamin

Why was yours the stained glass that cracked?

“Nothing ever happens on a Thursday,”
My bearded teacher would joke
And nothing – nothing – did pass
Till nothingness barged inside
52 Thursdays from last.

You were young but 28 years
Are years not counted with clocks
But loves and hates and miles
And a leaky trail of once-known souls.

(Soul, why do you rise when most
Violated or when Benjamins care?
I could ignore you for years
If you did not engage me with blows.)

I did not know you best or deepest
As we became the men who once inhabited 4 year
Old hearts that were hearts
Because there was no best or deepest then.

Then there were only games and jokes
And me wishing I was you
-I, I the sensitive one
So why was yours the stained glass that cracked?

52 Thursdays ago
Is a deep mystery in a cold cave
That I will never find
Thanks to you.

Thank you
For being a soul and seeing souls in
Chests that imprison
Until the restoration of all things
Such as your body.

Bryan Wandel
Bryan Wandel works in government finance and has studied history, accounting, and religion. He is a member of the editorial board at Humane Pursuits. Bryan’s writing has appeared at Comment Magazine, First Things, and elsewhere.

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